May 18th, 2005

Weird Al -- with me

(no subject)

It's going to take 13 hours for this program to download. Wtf? My internet logs off after one hour of use. I won't pay $200 for this program though.
I'm going to take you up on your offer to build me a site. Of course, that might not mean anything if it looks like gooblygook >:I
check out the spazzzy html
Weird Al -- with me

Brother bitching part 1

We haven't gotten our invetation to the wedding shower yet. My aunt has and I'm not on it. I am helping throw this piece of shit party. I need to buy the plates and lead a stupid game. But I'm not on it because I didn't attend two confrences I did'nt even know happened!
I'm wearing a shit dress that's sleevless. I told the bride that I don't like my arms exposed. I have to wear it anyway because I'm a clone.
I don't want to attend the shower and I don't want to attend the wedding. I don't want any part of this piece of shit wedding.
They want me to help at the bachlorette party. I don't want to but my brother forces me to. I find out that there will be male strippers. I'm sorry but that makes me uncomfortable. I consider myself old fashioned in certain aspects and I'm not comfortable being around naked guys. He said "Oh so you are old fashioned now? You have RATS!"
Of course the word "rat" is really pronounced. Yeah cause having rats makes me some sort of weirdo. So I'm not going to the bachlorette party. He yelled at me for "breaking a promise"
Blah. My mom started crying and she left. Now I know she won't enjoy the movie. My mom has been under stress and at least a movie would have cheered her up...until tonight. I hope she at least goes with me :(
I don't have anybody else to go with. I'm pissed off >:I
Not about the movie but about my brother. He thinks that because I don't have a job and because I have free time on the weekends, that I should drop everything I'm doing to help him and his woman. Piss off >:I
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Weird Al -- with me

(no subject)

Does anybody want to go to see Star Wars with me tonight? Mom is really upset and I'm not about to ask her to go :(
Movie's ruined for me. Yes I care more about this movie then my brother. I really do. Movie's ruined. Maybe I shouldn't even see it :(
Weird Al -- with me

Brother bitching part 2

Well I told him off. I said that I wasn't going to have my hair done by his woman's friend. I'm not going to change my shoes. Speaking of shoes, I can't wear heels. I can't, I have a phobia of killing myself on them. So I get really low healed silver shoes. I have to take them back and get stilletos. I have a hard enough time wearing REGULAR heels much less stilletos! I'm not going to do it. He wants mom to return her shoes, which I picked out. Her shoes are GORGOUS! He wants her to return her dress because it'll be nicer then her mom's. He told my grandmother she has to wear a dress! She bought a nice pair of pants for the wedding. She doesn't spend a dime on anything usually! This was a big thing that grandma did. He told our 94 year old grandma she can't wear what she wants. She's a grandma! THat's her right!
Bah. I hope I enjoy the movie. Again, yeah I do care more about a movie then his wedding.
Also, he also said that he always supports me. Ok suuuuure. I told him he always puts me down, calling me a fat hog (exact wording) and laughing at everything I try to do for myself. I want to become a vegatarian but I said I didn't have the self control for it (hey, I love the taste of meat). He laughed saying "yeah when you become a vegatarian is the day the towel heads shake hands with the Israelies"
First of all, towel heads?! Fucking racist! Secondly, I will become a vegatarian one day. With each passing day I get more and more guilty for enjoying a burger. Also, I want to take up scuba diving because it's a real sport and I would enjoy it. I overheard him tonight "So why doesn't she rent scuba gear and do it!? She's lazy! That's why!"
Wrong asshole. You can't just scuba. You need to learn how and be certified before you can rent (or so I think). California water is cold. I need a wetsuit and I am too large to get one. I can have one custom made but I would rather lose the weight. I'm not lazy asshat, I'm too big and broke. I can't afford scuba gear and lessons right now. When I get to my ideal weight I will treat myself to it but until then, I just swim and walk. He also always brings up the rats. I'm "strange and probably psycho" for enjoying rats. He "doesn't like to come into the house because of the rats"
Never mind the fact that they are in cages in a room that is closed off. He says "it stinks terribly!"
Well guess what? Even mom said the smell is much less. There's only a slight critter smell and ONLY when you are in front of my door. Much better then a few months ago! He likes snakes. Some people don't like them. Mom is extremely afraid of them and I don't think snakes should be pets (not because of the rat thing). But I don't say "oh you must be pshyco to like snakes!" I think snakes are beautiful, I just don't want one as a pet. I have friends that have snakes and they are as sane as I (err scratch that;)
Where was I going with this? I don't know. I lost my train of thought. He keeps calling me a 300 pound cow. I have never been 300. I'm actually 245. My highest was 289. I am gradually losing weight and his hurting me doesn't help. In fact, right now I'm eating macaroni and cheese :(
I'm improving my life little by little. I used to be a stupid fuckup slacker. But not anymore. Who is he to judge me!? He doesn't know me though he claims he does. He only comes over to discuss the wedding. God I wish he would just move out of state. Mom's home from taking him home. Yeah she drove him home. She was super upset but for some reason, he can get her to forget her emotions. I don't have mom drive me every little place. I take the bus! Mom only drives me if she herself wants to go too. Like, Barnes and Noble. I go there alone by bus usually, but sometimes she wants to buy a book and I'll never turn down a trip to a bookstore!
Blah. I'm going to go now. Force it out of my mind so I can enjoy the movie.
I don't think I've told you this but you guys really help me. <3
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