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Sometimes I just want to take out my boomstick and let loose...but I don't have a boomstick - Robot Skeleton Army Minion #1983
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Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 02:16 am
Sometimes I just want to take out my boomstick and let loose...but I don't have a boomstick


Beautiful video.


Alright, so yesterday was a completely horrible day.

I've only told a few people about this, but yesterday I had a kinda-sorta date. We were to meet at Santa Monica Beach and join a beach cleanup group and basically get to know each other over picking up trash. I was fairly excited by it. Even if nothing happened from it, I would have done some good for the Earth and meet people.
Well, this guy completely ruined it for me. I get there and the following insues...words might not be exact...
Him: okay, let's go.
Me: What? We're supposed to be cleaning the beach. I guess we could get a coffee down the street.
Him: Please, girls like you are good for only one thing and it isn't coffee.
At this point he looked me up and down and had this expression like I was scum and should be lucky he was giving me the time of day.
Me: >:O
I then proceeded to call him various things.
Him: Come on now, 'girls like you are desperate. Take what you can get
I basically told him to fuck off at that point.

I spent the next two hours taking my anger out on trash. Asshole.
When I told mom she said something like "well, you can't be surprised that men only see you like that. With your weight, people assume you are desperate"
I thought that too but I didn't need to hear it from my mom. She didn't say it as nicely though but she did apologize later...which baffled me.

So that was yesterday morning\afternoon.

Later that day, I talk to Ben (who was really pissed off on my behalf <3) and found out that we will get to spend very little...if any..time together when he comes down here. His parents want him to be completely focused on cleaning Grandma's house. I'll be lucky if I get to see him at all. My day was already shitty and when I heard that, I basically started crying.
We got on this subject when I told him about the Star Wars convention. He told me I should go and I told him I wanted to spend time with them...then he laid that bomb on me.
So, I may as well look into going to the convention. I'd rather hang out with him but if I can't, I may as well do something to take my mind off of it...

Yes, Wednesday sucked horribly for me.

I suppose that's it for now. Might update again before bed.

Also, I offer apologizes to people who updated the last few days. I haven't really been reading my lj this week, but I'll try to catch up by the weekend.

Tags: , , , , , , , ,
Current Location: Earth
Current Mood: depressed depressed
Current Music: Join Us---Evil Dead: The Musical

27CommentReplyShare

box_of_sorrows
Box Of Sorrows
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 09:51 am (UTC)

wtf?
I'm seething just from reading that. What sort of fucking scumshitcuntwanker treats anyone like that? I hope he tries that shit on with someone who turns out to be a seriously warped and psychotic serial killer and proceeds to butcher him slowly. All I can say is I'm just glad you're okay and he didn't try anything.

Blimey your mom and her attitudes at times baffle me too :-/

That's a shame about Ben, I'll bet he manages to wangle something though so you guys can spend some time together.


ReplyThread
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:02 am (UTC)

Seriously -.-
That's why I met him in public. Sadly, not even that is safe from some people but I was lucky.
Thanks.

I hope so too, even a few hours is good by me.


ReplyThread Parent
box_of_sorrows
Box Of Sorrows
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:18 am (UTC)

I'm just lost for words as to how anyone can be like that.
Don't let him (or your mom's comments) knock your confidence though, there's plenty of decent & genuine people out there and you really are a gem...


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:19 am (UTC)

Thanks. I know a few guys (who aren't available for various reasons) that are decent.


ReplyThread Parent
box_of_sorrows
Box Of Sorrows
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:26 am (UTC)

What were the other people at the beach cleanup like anyway? nice bunch?
I find the nicest people turn up at times/places where you're not even looking to find friends..


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:28 am (UTC)

Yeah, I met a couple of nice people. There's going to be a cleanup at a park not too far from me that I'll be going to. Most of the others will be there too. I won't be in a pissy mood so I'll probably be more outgoing (I was friendly even though I was angry)


ReplyThread Parent
box_of_sorrows
Box Of Sorrows
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 10:39 am (UTC)

sounds like a good chance to get to meet some really nice people and at least you'll know they're going there for a real reason...


ReplyThread Parent
cartoondoggy
cartoondoggy
Sara
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 02:08 pm (UTC)

Wow, that is indeed a shitty day. I'm really sorry all that happened to you. That guy is a miserable excuse for a human being. You don't deserve that. ((big hugs))

I hope your week improves.


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evilcresyluna
evilcresyluna
Miss Celie of the North
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 02:30 pm (UTC)

What a dumbass - don't let wankers like him (or your mom's comments) get you down, they're idiots and you deserve much better.

Could you clean out your Grandma's house too or no? It might not fun time together but you can still chat and kind of hang out.
Still, overall, sucktastic day and I'd kick a few shins for you if'n I could.


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witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 09:33 pm (UTC)

If my aunt allows, I'll definitely help clean.


ReplyThread Parent
machina
.
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 06:20 pm (UTC)

what the fuck?!?! where did you even meet this shitfuck? i am so sorry that happened, and i'm even more sorry i wasn't there to drop kick his ass.

your mom seriously needs to grow up. have you guys considered family therapy? the way that she talks to you is so harmful.


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witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 09:35 pm (UTC)

I met him on a Jewish dating site, I know some people who met great people so I gave it a shot.

Well I'm in therapy and my mom sees him sometimes as well. Every week my therapist calls her up for a little chat, doesn't help.


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machina
.
Thu, Apr. 26th, 2007 11:53 pm (UTC)

and your therapist knows your mother verbally abuses you?


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Fri, Apr. 27th, 2007 04:12 am (UTC)

Yes, he doesn't think it's verbal abuse I guess. "well Sara, you have to see it through her eyes. The words hurt but if you work on improving yourself she would have no reason to say things"
Bullshit.
Oh, and yes, I do want to stop seeing him and see another therapist but I can't afford to pay for therapy myself and if I stopped seeing him at all my mom would kick me out. Once I have the money, I'm out of here but until then, I have to see him -.-


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machina
.
Fri, Apr. 27th, 2007 05:29 pm (UTC)

there are therapists who work on a sliding scale. the one i go to just charges me whatever i can afford to pay. she's amazing.

any luck on the job front?


ReplyThread Parent
bellelvsbeast
bellelvsbeast
Officer Kelli
Fri, Apr. 27th, 2007 04:10 am (UTC)

Wow how did you meet this Prince of a man? :(
Good for you for sticking up for yourself. What an ass, a horrible person...:(
Ok your mom is just cruel. Who the fuck says that. Next when you're raped (god forbid I don't want to happen) she will say you "asked for it!"
Shit with moms like that, who needs enemies...
Sorry I just get so PISSED when parents ('scuse me "parent" since your dad would never say that to you) treat their kids like nothing...:(
You are special and deserve to be treated well.
At least she apologized, but she still never should have said that. Moms are supposed to encourage, not discourage...
Sorry for ranting...
Aw sad...I hope you guys squeeze in as much time together as you can...Sorry...:(
I don't mind, I know you are busy and stuff


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witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Fri, Apr. 27th, 2007 04:14 am (UTC)

She thinks she's being supportive but she just doesn't say it right. She does love me but she has a warped way of showing it.
I hope so too, I was really looking forward to that weekend.
But..and this is awesome, I got two tickets to see a presentation by Al Gore! Mom is going with me but plans on stepping aside if I find something out. How cool, Al Gore!

I also haven't been in the mood to read my f-list -.x


ReplyThread Parent
bellelvsbeast
bellelvsbeast
Officer Kelli
Fri, Apr. 27th, 2007 04:23 am (UTC)

I know, it just upsets me she would say things like that...I mean I've overweight and my mom saw me in February and yes we discussed my weight but she would never say anything negative.
I'm sorry, it just bothers me to read that...
I'm glad you feel you can share with me though. I just know if I was you I would have slapped my "mom" if she said that. But that's me.
Well that is kind of cool...ask him if he's super serial for me, PLEASE!
I loved that episode...and also ask him to explain the internets...hehehehehe
omg I am so glad I am not going to that, I would totally make fun of him
But he's cool, but so easy to make fun of...;)


ReplyThread Parent
yodallama
yodallama
Jessi (Yoda to some)
Sun, Apr. 29th, 2007 07:32 pm (UTC)
I haven't used my ANGRY icon in so long..

Whoa, wtf?! I think I would have slapped him and walked away. Or kicked him in the nuts. People like that should not be allowed to breed.

I can't even fucking believe someone would say that to you, I was nearly shaking reading that. Ugh.


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lovesnape
lovesnape
saffron
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 02:32 am (UTC)

What the fuck?! What a fucking asshole! Why can't guys people see the beauty in others? Dx< I'm sure you're beautiful, having not seen a picture of you. But I don't need one. From the little I've gleaned of you, I know you're kind, thoughtful, empathetic, fabulous, disciplined, assertive...among others. I'm positive you're gorgeous. I'm not talking about the fake beauty that comes with the age we live in and the society we're governed by - I mean real beauty. The kind that matters.

To me, there is no such thing as ugly. Self esteem and judgment gets in the way of discovering the beauty in yourself, but please know that you are pretty, you are beautiful. No matter what. :)

And way to stand up for yourself in front of that bastard. You rock. ;D

&hearts


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lovesnape
lovesnape
saffron
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 02:34 am (UTC)

I'm sorry. That comment was so difficult to convey, and I hope it didn't come across wrong... *bites nails* It's so hard to put in words what I mean. But did you know what I was getting at?


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 02:48 am (UTC)

Haha, I knew what you meant. I can say though, I'm not really assertive ;p


ReplyThread Parent
lovesnape
lovesnape
saffron
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 03:07 am (UTC)

Really? You've seemed to be... just from the little I've seen on your journal at least.
Do you mean you're not in that you procrastinate? or something else?


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 03:08 am (UTC)

I mean...I'm not assertive and tend to let people walk on me and take me for granted. -.-
I also procrastinate :P


ReplyThread Parent
lovesnape
lovesnape
saffron
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 03:10 am (UTC)

not from this post you don't! But I understand... I mean it's difficult, living life today without some kind of obstruction... (Whoa, Saffy, don't get all metaphorical and deep now! lolz)

Are you different online then in RL?


ReplyThread Parent
witherwings7
witherwings7
Agent 27
Mon, Apr. 30th, 2007 03:14 am (UTC)

Oh, yeah I can stick up for myself but..I suppose it's my family that I'm like that with.

I sound a bit more outgoing online then I am in real life. It can take me a bit to open up to somebody. I'm also more outspoken. People I know in real life, that I see on a normal basis, don't really care to hear me talk about my passions. People on my f-list all share my passions so I'm free to speak my mind about it.


ReplyThread Parent
lovesnape
lovesnape
saffron
Tue, May. 1st, 2007 12:16 am (UTC)

wow, same here. basically...yeah. ditto.
It's hard to explain for me, but I've kinna somehow managed to completely separate myself from fandom stuffs in RL. Like, it's gotten to my subconscious mind. O.O I'm actually dealing with it in therapy o_o yeah. crazy. :P
but yeah. just know that I'm totally in the same boat as you. &hearts


ReplyThread Parent